


In Case of Emergency, Call 666

by MessyWitch



Series: Vaguely AM flirting [1]
Category: Vaguely AM
Genre: Menace, Omen City, Omen City Fire Department, Sloane is a hopeless gay, Vulture is an ACTUAL bastard, how do you ask someone out? apparently like this, someone got set on fire because Zen Vaguely has a crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:14:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23649031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MessyWitch/pseuds/MessyWitch
Summary: Vulture is an Eldritch BASTARD and decides to terrorise a local firefighter because their best friend has a crush
Series: Vaguely AM flirting [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1702573
Kudos: 2





	In Case of Emergency, Call 666

**Author's Note:**

> Hey okay SO there's a podcast called Vaguely AM, and the characters are actually really fun to write, so I had a crack at writing the crack bastard that is Vulture terrorising one of the guests that were on the show 
> 
> You should check it out! It's on Spotify, it's got Welcome to Night Vale vibes but more supernatural, and more comedic

4 AM. Omen City. 

Operator: Police, Fire, Ambulance?  
Caller: Fire  
Operator: Okay, where are you located?  
Caller: Sacred Drive and Rise Avenue  
Operator: Alright, the nearest crew will be dispatched to your location. Do you need to stay on the line?  
Caller: No

Sirens blasted in Sloane’s ears as her fingers wound tightly around the handle as she pulled herself up and into the truck. Even inside, all the sounds of the world were drowned out by that siren, and she loved it. 

“Alright, Coldwell, you’re on Nozzle and investigation, apparently it’s small, so it’s just us, but Kincaid I’m gonna need you to stay alert up top just in case something decided to overstay the curfew welcome, got it?” Office Vin nodded once and didn’t wait for an answer before turning back as Reilly swung the truck out of the station. They screamed up the street, past the garage, a few apartment buildings, the Vaguely AM radio station that they’d tuned into all night, as usual, waiting to see if they would need to be called out to face the horrors that wrought murder and death across the city during curfew.   
Only it had been a quiet night, the tally had been low, and the host, Zen Vaguely, had been reporting and reading out submissions from the rest of the city. Not enough to hold her attention fully, Sloane had taken to the gym, since being on shift meant she was missing the fights and she had some excess energy she’d wanted to burn. She had still been going over an hour later when the sirens blared, and in moments her crew had assembled downstairs, heading out into the aftermath.   
The site of the fire wasn’t far, and it was mostly out by the time they reached the corner where it had been reported. She swung herself out of the truck, popped open the side with one hand and tugged on the hose, looping it over her shoulder and approaching the smouldering… 

“Of course it’s a body” she sighed, shaking her head slightly. Signalling quickly behind her, the hose vibrated in her hands, shaking as a steady stream of water burst out, and in seconds there was nothing left but ashy water.   
A shout came from behind, and Sloane dropped the hose, now turned off, and leaned back on her right leg, ready to spring forward if needed. 

“I guess Zen was right when she said she thought you were attractive” Sloane’s eyebrow quirked at a thick Scottish accent, coming from almost directly above her. Taking a step backwards, she looked up at the lampost. A figure was standing tall, arms outstretched, robes and hair billowing in the wind that didn’t seem to be that strong. Were they T-Posing? Seriously? Another step back and the pavement cracked underneath the figure’s feet as they dropped to the sidewalk. 

“Ah,” Sloane said with a smirk, “It’s Vulture, right? Ancient Eldritch Being and Terror of the Night?” There was a tug at the hose beside her foot, and she kicked it up with a boot, not taking her eyes off the towering figure in front of her. She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t utterly terrified, here, before her, was the one monster in Omen City most never wanted to come face to face with. Some had tried, but pieces of them had been scattered all across the city the next morning, bones gone and likely devoured.   
Here was the monster that all the others in Omen City lay awake thinking about at night. Standing in front of her, seeking her out, and… smirking?

“That’s right, you should drop by the studio sometime,” Sloane frowned, not following. 

“The Studio? Vaguely AM?”

“The one and only - we know you’re a listener, and you came and drowned the microwave that one time when our intern decided to hotwire it, and Zen hasn’t been able to shut up about you since. So, drop by sometime, or be dropped instead” Any pretence of friendliness dropped at the hint of a threat, but Sloane didn’t back down.

“I’d like to see you try,” she raised an eyebrow at them, feeling her back tingle as the wings of smoke began to ghost around her. 

“Hm” was all they said, before a crater and a resounding crack was left behind as they leapt into the night.   
Her shoulders sagged, and she ran through the motions of reeling in the hose on auto, not thinking about the last five minutes beyond ‘hells below I was just invited to go to the studio of my favourite radio show’ until she got back in the truck. Sagging against the back of her seat, she didn’t notice her crew gaping at her until she realised they weren’t moving. 

“How the everliving hells are you alive, Powder Keg? Do you know who that was?” 

“I do,” she said with a shrug, noticing the shadows in the street by the truck with a smile, even as concern for her crew shot through her at the sight of them. “No big deal, they just had a message to deliver”


End file.
